S~ Plums and dry Cheerios, filtered water
L~ Breakfast for lunch! Scrambled eggs, French toast, strawberries, cucumbers and milk
S~
These are a few things I've learned along the way, and I always like a refresher myself because it is easy to forget these little strategies~ which can make such a big difference in your day!
Tips for cooperation
There are times when you can accept a "yes" or "no" answer from your child and other times when compliance is not an option.
Times like these would include bedtime, mealtimes, leaving your home in the morning and going back home at the end of the day.
Tip #1 Prepare your child. Walk them through what will be happening and the behavior you expect and what will happen afterward. Such as:
"We are going grocery shopping. You will ride in the cart. We are not buying toys or candy but you can hold the list and put things in the cart. When we get home, I will put the groceries away-you can help or play quietly- and then we will read a story together!"
I have done similar activities with the children, instructing them on the behavior I expect and then letting them role play. We make it fun by allowing them to demonstrate the incorrect way as well- which usually erupts in peals of laughter. Once we practiced "how to behave at pick-up time" which included "gentle hugs" for grandmother when she comes to pick up, leaving when we're told to, and not running out the door. They had a blast practicing gentle hugs and hugs that went overboard, and waiting vs running out the door. Their behavior improved dramatically over the next few weeks- til we needed another role play.
Tip #2 Five minute warnings are very useful. "In 5 minutes it is time to ____; I will tell you when 5 minutes is up and then we will ______." A timer is wonderful for this, as it can be the "bad guy" and it's inanimate~ you can't argue with it. When you child is older, you can also tie this in with learning to tell time, "when the big hand moves to the "3" we will ___".
Tip #3 is to "tell" your child, not "ask" them. If you ask them- (or tell them but tack "okay?" at the end), then you have asked them what they want to do and you have set yourself up for a "No" when there really is no choice.
A more effective strategy is to "tell" your child what you want, then give them an option of how to comply.
If you feel they might run off, hold their hand when you tell them. It could sound like this.
"It is time for bed, do you want to tiptoe or hold my hand and hop to your room?"
Or "It is time to go home now, would you like to hold my hand and run to the car or hold my hand and walk?"
In an example like this if your child interjects "skip to the car!" Then certainly go with it. They are cooperating, which is your goal.
If you find they typically pick a "third" choice when you're offering 2, then you can just build that in by offering one choice and then asking for their idea. If it is agreeable then go with it, if not have them think of another idea.
Finally, picking them up and not offering any choice also works if they just won't cooperate.
If this happens, it is a prime thing to talk about and role play at a later time. If a child is upset they are not going to be able to hear you, so it is best to wait for a calm time, outside of the situation.
This can help calm you as well: you have a plan for improvement and you can act on it at an appropriate time.
Tip #4 When possible, give your child time to practice their self-help skills. Try to build extra time into your routine for when they are learning a new skill and "want to do it themselves"
If mornings are just too hectic, then make a playtime on the weekend or evening of just putting on shoes- or their jacket or whatever skill they are immersed in learning. Your child will impress you and they will love your attention! This will also make it easier for the times you are rushed because you child knows they will get a chance to practice later and is more likely to cooperate.
A final tip- As we come to the end of a season, store clothing items that will be a definite "no" to wear, such as wearing their big winter coat on the hottest day in July or their sandals on the coldest day in January. If they don't have access to it they won't want to wear it ~ out of sight out of mind~ plus it's much easier to say "no, sorry, it's stored away".
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Today's photos:
I didn't bring the camera outside today but we did get out. Lots of digging and swinging. Daniel loved climbing up and down the slide. Jack was everywhere! I let him crawl around and he had the best time exploring the sandbox, mulch and under the play-fort :-)
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